翻译问题

Question

As we have some big problems in implantation and management for fish department.We invite your sales manager (Joen Xie)to come to our store for the staff trainning,if it's possible and convenient,can you send a schedule for me?And we will pay all the costs of transportation .Thank you for your support.
想麻烦大家帮我看下这段英文有什么问题，有语法错误吗 ？

Answer 1

Currently we're facing some issues in fish farming.
(要是楼主想表达的意思是“鱼类养殖",特别是规模大的鱼类养殖，适合的词是”fish farming”。如果是私人性质如因为兴趣而进行的养鱼活动，那是“fish breeding”。）

Thus, we would like to invite your sales manager, Ms Joen Xie(我假定是Ms啦，要是他是GG的话就改成Mr吧）to come to our premise and conduct training of our professional fish farming technical staff accordingly.

We will bear all transportation costs for this training arrangement.
(我们将支付安排这个员工训练的交通费用）

Please send me the training schedule and training documents at your earliest convenience.
(这里小改了一下：请尽快将训练时间表及训练文件发送给我。)

Thank you for your support.

希望能帮到楼主！:)

Answer 2

由于我们在渔业的植入和管理上有较大问题，我们想邀请你们的销售经理（Joen谢）光临我们店里指导员工培训。如果可能并且方便的话，你们能寄一份日程安排表给我吗？我们会支付所有的交通费用。非常感谢你们的支持。

语法方面，
首先，是send sth to sb而不是for;其次，你想要表达交通费用，最好用transportation fees而不是cost of transportation

完毕~

Answer 3

因为我们在鱼的植入和管理方面出现较为严重的问题，所以诚邀您到我们的商店对我们的员工进行培训，如果你方便的话，可以给我说说你的时间安排吗？？？至于交通费用方面，我们会全额负责的。真的拜托您了。

Answer 4

当我们有很大的问题,管理部门对鱼的植入…我们邀请你的销售经理(Joen谢)到我们店里的员工培训,如果可能的话,方便,你能送一份时间表给我吗?”我们将支付所有的运输成本。谢谢你们的支持。

基本无语法错误

Answer 5

第一句结尾应该用逗号，还有if it's possible and convenient前应该用句号。再者if it's convenient就可以了，你这样写是中式英语。最好把这句话放到can you send a schedule for me后面，符合英语思维习惯。can you send a schedule for me，这个改成can you send me a schedule?
And we will pay all the costs of transportation，改为of course,...句首就用and太口语，或者直接去掉and。

Answer 6

As we have some big problems in implantation and management in the fish department,we would like to invite your sales manager,Mr.Joen Xie,to come to our store for the staff trainning.因为as在此当作连接词使用，其后必须产生一个主要的句子。因此we必须改为小写。If it's possible and convenient,can you send a schedule to me? 至於send物件to 某人则是固定用法。And we will pay all the costs of transportation. Thank you for your support.此句OK。